Pam Marries Poker Partner

Guess who decided to go a little crazy in Vegas this week? No, it's not about gambling away tons of money. Well, close enough. What do you do when you play a really horrible game of poker? Sitting there, lost and somewhat sheepish, wondering how to pay the $250 000. Well, if you are Pamela Anderson you could always marry your poker partner.

Let's not be too harsh. Maybe it's love, it could work. Pamela has come a long way; from the ever famous Baywatch, she moved onto stellar projects like Less Than Perfect, Stripella, Stacked ... Ironic that the titles speak for themselves. And let's not forget the over-hyped video with Tommy Lee. While on the topic, the groom in question is none other than Rick Salomon. Remember him? One of Paris Hilton's conquests and proud participant of the porn video with Paris Hilton. There must have been some pride involved, after all he decided to distribute it via Red Light District Video. With two infamous movies between them, it does sound like the perfect match, doesn't it?

Happy groom was quoted as saying, "I've been plotting and scheming for the past 15 years, and I finally got the girl." Hmm, does this mean teenage boys all over should keep a lookout for a new video on YouTube?

Wolverine Prequel sets a date

It's official! The much publicized Wolverine spin-off has finally, finally got a release date. Well, it is about time! Didn't they start talking about this movie since the third X-men extravaganza? Aptly called X-Men Origins: Wolverine and is set to be released in May 2009. I like the name, it gives me hope that there's going to be more prequels, maybe X-Men Origins: Storm, something about Xavier? One can dream. Anything to get over this Ninja Turtle hype.

Story is gonna be about Wolverine's early days and so, sadly, no hectic motorbike scenes ... at least not on Scott's fancy bike. Gavin Hood of the Tsotsi fame is going to direct and Liev Schreiber might be playing Stryker, that somewhat zealous army colonel who hates mutants. Wolverine is all about raw energy and anger and so I hope the director doesn't go out of his way to tone down the violence. Nah, not for the sake of the children but to sell it to more audiences. Wolverine is hairy version of a dark and brooding Batman. Minus the “I won't kill” slogan, of course. Anyway, let's hope that Gavin Hood sticks to the comic book feel and doesn't strip it too much of its novelty. I don't doubt Hood's ability as a director, but movie studios have a nasty habit of removing darker undertones from movies. If you don't believe me, check out the annoying animated movies that keep coming out. If I see one more animated movie with a forlorn wild animal fitting into an urban setting .... Hollywood producers should take a look at different genres of anime. Regarding the themes of the movie, Hood has been quoted as saying “How much of his violence should [Wolverine] embrace? How much should he set aside?”. Let' wait and see.

Other topics covered in the movie – the highly secret Weapon X program, romantic angle ( because even a wolf has needs, I mean feelings ) as well as good old Sabretooth.

Misconduct at Oprah's School

We're heard a lot about US detention centers around the world, including the one adorning Oprah Winfrey's name. By now you're thinking, Huh? The Oprah? Detention centre? Yea, it was such a great deal that she put her name on it. Fine, enough of the melodrama, I'll elaborate. It's the absolutely famous and somewhat scandal-ridden Oprah Winfrey's Leadership Academy for Girls. In all fairness, I'm not the first to call it a detention center. Probably not the last either.

But given the bad press the school's been receiving you're forgiven for mistaking it for a prison. How is similar to a holding cell, well let me count the ways ... remember the I'm-entitled-to-one-phone-call rule? Oh, sure, you get to call your parents. But only on weekends. Think they'll miss you tons and want to see you more often? Think again. Parents can visit only once a month. And make sure you put the visitation papers through the warden, sorry school officer, two weeks in advance. Did I tell you that they get points for “good behavior”? And just to make sure everyone is putting in 100% for the school spirit, there's no email or cell phone communication during the week. What, are they scared of the Who wants to be a Millionare effect? Afraid someone will sneak into a bathroom during a math exam and call up a lifeline for answers? Wanna up the creepy factor? Turns out local police has restricted access to the school. I can understand men with dodgy mustaches offering candy bars but the police? Shouldn't they be on call or serve and protect or something like that?

Now that I've pointed out this old scandal about this strange little school in Henley-on-Klip, Johannesburg, let's talk about a new one. I had my reasons for building up with old news. Well, there's new controversy surrounding Oprah detention center for girls, this one involves claims of misconduct. Apparently, it's about one of the dormitory parents (am guessing fancy term for residence officer? With all the fuss about parents visiting you don't think they would let one of the pupil's actual parents in, did you?). Yea, this person has been suspended and can't attend to the girls. The news report didn't say if the person in question was a man or woman; in fact, I didn't think the gender of dormitory mother hen /rooster was in anyway significant until the news presenter went out of his way to say “We don't know if it was a man or a woman.” Ok, I think to myself, that's cryptic for “this is significant for story, hold onto that thought”. This could be some minor hiccup, maybe it was something silly like someone snuck in some junk food for the inmates. Then how come there's gonna be people from US coming in to investigate? Of course local officials are gonna be collaborating with those from US. Makes you wonder, doesn't it? Is it big enough to involve not just local officials but some guys from US have to be brought in as well? Did I also mention that child protection services have been called in?

See, that's the crazy thing about this place. You would want the kids to have access to communication and be able to call Mom, Dad or their Aunt Bertia if and when anything happens. We can usually tell when something goes awry in prisons; the rioting, the hunger strikes, secret interview to their lawyer. 10-12 year olds don't have the streetwise know-how of hardened criminals. So if you limit access to their families, local police or other well wishing adults, who would they really contact if something nasty happens? Will they even know who to tell? Would they know when something wrong is happening and they should yell and run in opposite direction? This sounds like a bad ad with the tag line Would you send your child to this school?

BET Hip Hop Awards 2007

It's that time of the year again. A truly glamorous event boasting excellent performances, snappy lyrics and, of course, the announcement of this year's BET Hip Hop Awards. Held in the Atlanta Civic Centre on October 13th, Saturday, it was a happy ceremony with barely concealed pride amidst the winners and wistful looks from the rest of the nominees. Well, somewhat happy. Judging from the number of times Grammy-winner T.I. was mentioned, the mood was somewhat sober. Of course, it could just be the collective thought of a few guys thinking “What, T.I. was arrested? No way, man, I saw him earlier in the week ... Tonight? Damn! He was my ride home!!”. Bottom line? Apparently being a cocaine dealer was one thing but dealing with firearms was just the a bigger no-no.

The ceremony was graced by famous names along with some fabulous performances. Kayne West started off with “Good Life” from his new album Graduation. Interesting song, cool moves. Here's a thought – you know how he used a sample of Micheal Jackson's song “Pretty Young Thing”. Well, check this out. Turns out he's also working on M.J.'s new studio album. Well, well! Someone made the right moves somewhere.

Other notable performances include “Go Lil Mama”, a new single by Nelly ( yes, yes, there were women surrounding / in the vicinity of Nelly ... almost his trademark, isn't it?), “Ay Bay Bay” by Hurricane Chris, “Drivin' Me Wild” by Common, Playaz Circle along with Lil' Wayne and Ludacris performing “Duffle Bag Boy” and of course, “Crank That” by Soulja Boy. Barely outta his teens and he's already made it big time. For the past few months, everyone's been talking about his trend setting dance moves. It's catchy, it's fascinating, it's one of those things. Remember Macarena? Love it, hate it, everyone knew it. Yeah, well, if you check out Youtube, there is a handy little instructional video telling you just how to crank it. Er, while on the topic ... remember the superman move in the song? Well, the stage version for BET Awards had them wearing superman capes. Let me savor that image for a while.

Now, for the nominees and winners.

Common was the articulate winner of the Lyricist Of The Year award, with Lil Wayne, Jay-Z, T.I. And Kayne West jostling each other as nominees. Makes sense that this vegan was in the PETA ad that thoughtfully asked you to “Think Before You Eat”. Man, he does choose his words carefully.

Most played song this year, one which had players uniting and rejoicing as one can only do at the wedding. Yep, it's "International Player's Anthem" by UGK ft Outkast , winner of 2007's Best Hip-Hop Collabo. Putting on the proud faces of so-close-yet-not-this-year were the other nominees - Birdman & Lil Wayne for "Stuntin' Like My Daddy", Diddy ft Keyshia Cole for "Last Night", DJ Khaled ft Akon, T I, Rick Ross, Fat Joe & Lil Wayne for "We Takin' Over", Fabolous ft Ne-Yo for "Make Me Better".

Kayne West is definitely getting “Stronger” this year as he walked away with the award for Best Hip-Hop Video. Must admit, he did have strong contenders with 50 Cent for the song "I Get Money",

Chamillionaire ft Slick Rick for "Hip-Hop Police", Common for "The People", Ludacris ft Mary J Blige for "Runaway Love" and UGK ft Outkast for "International Player's Anthem". Interesting how everyone's talking about the Player Anthem as the song of the Year and it didn't quite land the deal? Just a thought.

And of course, Best Hip Hop Dance went to none other than Soulja Boy for Crank Dat Soulja Boy. The nominees were good and memorable but really, who can resist those top tapping, bendy moves. I personally think it was the wavy arm move. It's been a while since I saw that video but the image just lingers. Kinda like the hypno frog from South Park.

Never-ending Spell

She's got Brad under her spell. And most of the world. I don't know what it is but half the world is mad about her – it's like a collective madness fallen under the spell of hypnotic, twirly, psychedelic circles. That explains her passing out – must be the hard work, working your charms day and night.

I'm talking about none other than good old Angelina Jolie. You know, the one with a strange collection of knives. As I recall, there was some bizarre story with a blood vial. And tattoos, did I tell you about the tattoos?

Nice build up, isn't it? This dreary description is just to keep a perspective on the current story. She's got lots of plus points, some of which I might even mention. I mean, she's an actress by day, UN ambassador on weekends, juggling a relationship with a high profile partner along with four kids. Give Angelina her very own Jolie-mobile, put her on the cover of Working Moms and we are sorted.

Anyway, there's a rumor going around that Angelina Jolie passed out on the set of The Changeling. No, Clint Eastwood didn't creep up on her in one of his Western outfits ( although that would explain a lot, wouldn't it? Kinda like a real life manifestation of that guy from Courage the Cowardly Dog). When it becomes glaringly obvious that she's not offering any explanations, there is a sudden rush to come up with theories. You know what I mean. Think of any instance where a celebrity has done something strange or controversial or outright shocking. Now filter through to incidents which lack statements by celebrities themselves. Anyone notice how everyone and anyone ( other than the people in question ) offers helpful explanations?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not criticizing any of these theorists. In fact I am one of them, trying vainly to uncover the cause of this latest fainting spell. This is just me pointing out one of those instances that defy explanations. Back to fainting. At this point, I would pause and say “Hang on! Didn't her mother pass away sometime this year?”. Yea, maybe she is still grieving. Happens you know. Her brother did say, somewhere, that she was eating less whilst mourning. Yes, maybe that's it.

Hang on! Didn't she have a a few fainting spells whilst shooting in October 2006? It was all everyone talked about – Angie passing out in Pune, shooting for A Might Heart too hectic, A Mighty Heart passes out, etc. etc. I suppose we would wonder whether her mother's illness was weighing her down. Wait, wasn't there a rare news article mentioning erratic eating habits? Nah, must be coincidence.

Speaking of last year ... I recall a great fuss beginning of last year about Angelina being pregnant and, surprise, surprise, passing out. Hmmm! I believe people brushed it off as hard work and tough pregnancy. I forget now, was there any mention of food or lack of it?

I don't think baby blues is the cause for Mommy Tomb Raider's dizzy spells. After all, there was that utterly bizarre fainting spell in an LA airport in 2005? That's it, I'm outta theories for this one. For all of them for that matter. All explanations welcome. Preferably wacky ones involving gun slinging cowboys.

Paris Hilton’s Africa Expedition.

Paris Hilton will be wrapping up her musical-horror film called “Repo! The Genetic Opera” at the end of October and we expect her to fulfill her promise to visit Rwanda.

Paris said that her experience in jail has changed her and she will use her celebrity status to highlight humanitarian causes world-wide.

Paris will not be clueless in Rwanda. She accompanies “Playing for Good”, a charitable organization. This group was founded by Scott Lazerson in 2006. It helps celebrities to lend their megawatt personalities to aid charities assisting needy families and children.

Paris, 26, promised to continue her philanthropist efforts in countries with poverty and needy children. She justified this by saying, “I know there’s a lot of good I can do just by getting involved and bringing attention to these issues.” Note how she does not give away money but gives away her loving attention to those financially strapped.

Rwanda has her own celebrity status for being the infamous country accredited with her 1994 genocide where 1 million lives were lost. That represented one ninth of her population. Paris did not comment upon how she expected to cope if she encountered Rwanda’s unsanitary drinking water in the 59% of the population. Scott Lazerson has done a good job convincing Paris. Paris has revealed that she will be filming her journey as part of her bigger plan to include the reel in a movie about her experiences in Rwanda. This does not come as a surprise, given her love for the camera and for theatrics in all causes bad and good. So, Paris will not be leaving her entire glamorous wardrobe at home. She has 5 days to showcase her Rwanda experience.

We may expect to see a whole new range of fashion threads suitable for the hot, hot Rwanda and Paris Hilton climate in Africa.

We’re already missing glossy Paris Hilton dresses like these!

Hair raising problem for Iggy

By now you're probably aware of the recent fiasco with Ellen Degeneres. Here's how I heard the news. One well meaning soul inquired of me, "Have you heard the latest about Ellen?" What, what happened, I wondered, imagining some controversial publicity stunt ... after all, she is a talk show host and stand up comedienne who comments about anything and everything. "She had to give up Iggy, poor thing, she was sobbing away on her show, crying, bawling her eyes out, terrible really" was my informant's cryptic reply. That's it, I had to make a mad scramble for my computer and google the latest on Ellen. Who's Iggy, is that an old flame from the past? Did Ellen anger the head honcho of some organization and had to apologize? Maybe a dear friend of hers was kidnapped in a war torn region and she was pleading for his safe return.

Well, it was nothing quite as dramatic as then. Not to say it wasn't sad. It had its moments... some of which was sad. Just a tad.

The story goes that Ellen and her partner adopted a Brussels Griffon mix named Iggy and showered it with celebrity love, sorry, I mean foster pet owner's love in the form of let's-love-my-cats-training and the rather tedious procedure of nipping of Iggy's family jewels ( also known in the medical circles as neutering ). Well, after all that training and $3,000 later, turns out Iggy didn't quite graduate from the I-Love-Felines-School. Actually, that's not right, Ellen's excuse was that the little fella was too hyperactive and not right for the household. Makes you wonder, doesn't it? What exactly did Iggy do? Run off with their favorite shoes? Break their favorite china plates? Chew up a tiara? Honestly, if all Ellen and Portia wanted was a furry pet that ate all day and slept on their favorite armchair, then just get another cat.

Wait, there's more. Once the inevitable truth came to light, Ellen decided to give Iggy to her hairdresser's little ones. Nice gesture but obviously not from the "my pets are my kids" generation. Yea, let's wait till they adopt / have a kid who has ADD and see what happens. So what brought on Ellen's sobbing outburst, you ask? Turns out there was a return unwanted pets clause in the fine print of Mutts and Moms Dog Rescue agency ( i.e. where they got Iggy ). Pause there for a minute. I'm sure the agency have the best intentions at heart and do immense good for animals but ... Mutts and Moms? Seriously? Am I the only one who cringe when seeing the name of a dog next to noun reference for a female?

It could be referring to Mommy dogs. That still doesn't help the picture. Makes you think that there is the

horrid b**** word looming in the distance.

Are moms involved in the rescue operation or do they have a special consideration for mommy dogs?

Anyway, if Ellen's teary show was anything to go by, Mutts and Moms are snatching poor Iggy from the tender loving hands of two sad kids. I'm sure they have their reasons. Sure, some nasty pet owners dispose of the helpless ones in manners befitting reference in a Law and Order: SVU episode. Some of them even give the pets away ( unanimous gasp! ).

But they probably didn't reckon that Ellen would pull the celebrity card on them. I mean, she's got her own show and she can talk about what she wants. And she cried so hard about poor Iggy on Tuesday that people came out with brooms, pitchforks, baseball bats and some staplers. Well, not really, but the agency has been getting death threats. Probably by some guy who has / owns / was near one or two baseball bats. Bet some wisecracker is gonna be throwing in the b*** word now.

Ellen states that she doesn't want the poor pup to lose his new caring home. Understandable. She might also be remembering that you shouldn't belittle your waiter or insult your barber. Yea, with her hairdresser's little ones crying over the loss of Iggy, I bet Ellen doesn't want to be in the chair when her hairdresser starts snipping away at tresses. Just when you thought her hairdo couldn't get any worse.

Dinah Lohan: Entourage or Mother?

AND THE AWARD GOES TO....Heard about the latest addition to Over Ambitious Moms from Hollywood? Why, it's none other than party girl Lindsay Lohan's own limelight loving mom, Dinah Lohan.

Wait, perhaps it was a bit hasty to call Dinah an Over Ambitious Mom. Indeed, it is distasteful and insulting to compare her to the traditional maternal figures who are ready with tender hugs when you are feeling blue and yet, hopefully not in the same room with you if they happen to find rolled up joints in your jean's pockets. I can't really compare her to my mom or any mothers I know ... can you?

Therein lies the problem. Given the prominent role Dinah Lohan has been playing in her wild child's life (she is the mother and the manager so technically she's in charge at home and at work, right?), it is more appropriate and enlightening to view Dinah through her reactions to the glitz, the glamor brought on by her daughter's rise to fame and of course, through the infamous lifestyle of Lindsay herself.

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

I've heard people state (jokingly, I hope) that they would give an arm and a leg for a few minutes in the spotlight. And thus, perhaps it is a new trend to offer your first born on the red carpet of Hollywood and fervently hope for a bit of glitter dust on yourself. Oh but then, it's more than sprinkling of dust if you are the manager, isn't it?

You can't help but wonder about the parental nudges and prods, when little Lindsay entered the advertising world at the tender age of 3. I mean, did she wake up one morning and wonder, amidst uttering of baby talk, whether she could make it to the catwalk? Did she point at a random cereal ad on TV and gurgle about her dreams as a model?

Maybe it's not all about the money. Maybe they wanted what was best for their little one. Or was it business as usual when, during divorce proceedings, Micheal Lohan fought with Dinah over her earnings as manager to Lindsay.

Will the Real Lohan Please Stand Up?

Whoever talked about women aging gracefully certainly didn't have Dinah Lohan in mind. Don't get me wrong, it's not like she resembles the Wicked Witch of the West. Far from it – stunning and well-kept, Dinah looks eerie like a slightly older Lindsay Clone.

Oh no, it's not about how old you look; age doesn't really come into the strange equation we call Lindsay and Dinah. The keyword we are looking for is clone.

Doesn't anyone else notice the eerie similarity between those two? It certainly would be more dignified if Lindsay looked like the younger version of Dinah as opposed to the latter making a desperate attempt to look like her barely-out-of-her-teens daughter. Identity crisis, anyone?

Wait, there's more! When it comes to Lindsay, Dinah doesn't just “walk the walk and talk the talk”. Oh no, she takes it just a little bit further on the creepy scale. Who else has cringed every time mommy dearest defended claims / stories of Lindsay's drinking, drugs, or bulimia as if she was talking about herself, where it is just so easy to be misunderstood when you are partying like any other 20 year old.

How about these notable quotes?
"Noooo! She is just a twenty-year-old who had to reel it in. And she's from an addictive personality genetically." Hmm, sounds like a case of I don't like the drink but the drinks like me?

“This [premieres and parties] is the fun part of the business. ... But there are these dark stories – she is so misunderstood. All she wants to do is act and have a somewhat normal life. When you’re 20, it’s normal to want to go to The Ivy, to go to the hot stores. She can’t live in a bubble.” Whatever happened to “You're better be home by 11, young lady, or else!”

"You know, you can't blame parents for kids." Does Dr. Phil know about this?

Dinah Lohan certainly is a sorry excuse for a mother. Latest rumor is that she wants to spread her tentacles, sorry, motherly love to the rest of her kids in the guise of a a new show on E! What can you say except a well intended warning – run while you can!
**********************